SilverFoxWise

It was a perfect day for a round of golf and the eagerly-awaited reunion of pandemic-estranged business pals. On this day, eight comrades—whose origins of friendship can be traced back to several decades of working together at an insurance company—gathered in giddy anticipation, well over an hour before tee time at Crosswinds Golf & Country Club in Burlington.

The Golf Portion of the Program

While the competitive program for the day was designed as friendly incentive, there was no shortage of game formats and bragging rights crowns to be awarded at day’s end. Through the magic of technology and a more than willing computer nerd, the post-round input of hole-by-hole scores instantly revealed the winners. For individual scoring, cherished gloating privileges were available for: Low Gross, Low Net, and Highest Stableford Quota Points titles.

In the four-man team competition (Pfizer vs Moderna), the victors would need to win at least two of three scoring formats: Best Ball (the average of the four gross scores), Quota Points (the sum of each player’s points based on their net score, and Match Play (hole-by-hole match based on the lowest net score per team).

As golfing enthusiasts will appreciate, handicapping is an imperfect science with a long history of dubious disclosures and questionable net winners. The term “sandbagger” (among others, less suitable for print), was coined to identify those who padded handicaps to a degree that produced net scoring results defying the boundaries of plausibility. On the other hand, handicaps can also serve as a convenient focus of protest by bitter runners-up of lesser achievement.

The organizing member of this particular function settled on 80% of the player’s filed handicap—for those formally tracking such data—and 80% of an estimated handicap based on typical scoring and the degree of recent play, for those not in possession of an official handicap.

For the record, the writer in no way suggests there was any handicap jiggery-pokery at play and cautions readers against jumping to any nefarious conclusions on the pure happenstance that both first and second place individual net winners came within scant strokes of matching the low gross score of the day. 😉

Hearty congratulations to the individual and team winners with some impressive rounds of golf:

INDIVIDUAL WINNERS: Low Gross – Rob Barbisan (82); Low Net: Derek Stewart (66), Highest Quota Points: Derek Stewart (49)

TEAM WINNER: MODERNA: Rob Barbisan – Dave Payette – Derek Stewart – Rob Park

Where it all Started

After more than a year-and-a-half of virtual isolation in the confines of our respective Covid bunkers, this day was as much about the reunion of friends as it was the playing of golf. Even without a pandemic, opportunities for such a gathering—for an occupationally and geographically scattered group—are tough to find. Three of the eight attendees are happily retired. Another pair has moved on to work with other companies.

There is a special bond between longtime colleagues-turned-friends that seems to endure time and distance. We are from a generation that spent decades—rather than a few years (or months)—at a single place of employment. Most of us started in together as young, ambitious trainees, full of piss and vinegar and eager to soar through the hierarchy of a prominent Canadian insurance company.

In the early days, in spirited attempts to gain recognition at company conferences, a few of us would battle for the enviable position of being ‘first in’ with a question when our CEO finished his opening remarks and pointedly solicited our queries. It was clear the CEO disliked dead air in this pivotal moment, and we keenly recognized a fertile opportunity for career glory. In the rush to blurt out a question, there were, admittedly, some poorly composed efforts that bordered on oratorical drivel.

But in our experience, it was not so much the quality of the question as it was its timely delivery, that mattered most. The objective was to prevent that dreaded period of feet-fidgeting silence, with an initiative that, to us, carried limited personal risk. Fortunately, the CEO had an uncanny ability to answer a poorly posed question in a way that made it seem semi-insightful. By the time he had deftly pivoted to spend twenty minutes on unrelated points of his choosing, the original question was largely forgotten.

Bring on the Bromance

Individual career trajectories varied, of course, but this is a group that worked hard and had some fun together in the process. Everyone achieved some level of business success and personal achievement. From the management or executive level positions we found ourselves in, across various fields, there was a kind of kindred connection that was maintained through the years.

Over twenty or thirty years, we found ourselves at varying levels in the hierarchy. In some cases the versatility among us was tested by direct reporting relationships. Some relationships among the cohort were further pressure-tested when reporting lines were subsequently reversed.

What has bound this group for so many years may have something to do with the common interests in sports and entertainment. It could be enhanced with compatible senses of humour. But it is more likely a by-product of having shared a long history of the ups and downs that come with a career and a personal life. We have seen each other at our personal and professional best and celebrated the wins. But we’ve also seen each other through struggles and shared in some of the bumps along the way.

There is perhaps a less obvious source of adhesion for this band of brothers. Looking back, it was a rare occasion that there was any serious conflict among the members throughout a career-long dynamic that often had us competing for the same piece of cheese. And to the extent there were rubs, we always seemed to get safely to the other side of it.

More often, we leveraged our respective spheres of influence to champion causes for one another. We put in a good word up the line; or, ran some interference for a mate in the crosshairs. As best we could, with whatever influence we had at the time, we looked out for one another—some positive interventions known to the beneficiaries, some that never will be.

A Tradition Begins

Whatever the dynamics of our friendship, what was clear from this very pleasant reunion is how smoothly we assimilate into the old schtick and routines. It has been years now, for many, and it seemed like the personas, stories and recollections were from yesterday. This group is capable of some of the finest chirping and one-liners on the market and there was no shortage of humour, laughter and happy reminiscences on this day.

This may just be the start of a beautiful tradition.

*Photos courtesy of Paul Stone

I’m Derrick Coyle; proud husband, father and grandad, happily retired in London, Ontario after a long and satisfying career in the world of insurance. SilverFoxWise is a personal blog created to indulge a longtime passion and scratch a creative itch; an introspective boomer’s cathartic canvas of musings and perspectives. Thanks for coming along for the read.